I’m a fairly ordinary gal, making an attempt to navigate the sometimes shark-infested waters of marriage and wifedom, parenting and step-parenting. It’s a crazy existence being a full-time wife, full-time Mom, full-time Stepmom, full-time employee (anything else?), but it’s usually pretty fun. When it’s not pretty fun, I’m learning to look heavenward for the answers (looking inward doesn’t seem to help much).
LIVING ARRANGEMENT?
One husband, four kiddos (two girls, two boys), one grouchy cat, a turtle named Fred, a giant Oscar, a small-mouth bass (caught to eat, had a change of heart, adopted as a pet), and other assorted fish.
WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
The Gold Coast – Nelson DeMille
WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSEPAD?
The logo of one of my former employers – sometimes it evokes good memories, sometimes not so much.
FAVORITE BOARDGAME?
Cranium. Really I’m much more a fan of cards–Hearts, Spades, Speed, you name it.
FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
People – it’s a sickness. I’m seeking therapy.
FAVORITE SMELL?
Baby Magic Baby Shampoo – it’s been a long time since I’ve smelled it, though.
LEAST FAVORITE SMELL?
Mildew. A close second is rotting food, particularly when it’s coming from the backpack of any of my children.
FAVORITE SOUND?
My kiddos laughing. (“Mommy, I love you” is right up there, too.)
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
How can it be morning already?
FAVORITE COLOR?
Purple – any shade.
FAVORITE FRUIT?
Strawbabies.
HOW MANY RINGS TO ANSWER THE TELEPHONE?
Less than 4 because then the answering machine picks up, but it really depends on whether the last person to use it actually hung it up in the cradle or not.
WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE?
God and family. Although chocolate is pretty important, too.
FAVORITE FOOD?
My husband’s Salisbury Steak, and any kind of seafood.
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Is there really even a choice here?
DO YOU DRIVE FAST?
Nope, drive like a grandma (no offense intended to anyone who might be a grandma, especially my mother who is a grandma but absolutely does NOT drive like one)
DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
Does my husband count?
STORMS: COOL OR SCARY?
Cool, definitely.
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?
1978 Cadillac Sedan DeVille. It was white and we called it “The Land Yacht”. It could fit 15 people in it (no, not comfortably–yes, including the trunk).
DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
Absolutely!
WHAT WOULD BE YOUR FAVORITE JOB IN THE WORLD?
I’m doing them both – being Mom and volunteering for a shelter.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HAIR COLOR?
On me? Anything that does not involve red the color of a stop sign, or roots.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
Definitely. Right now, on so many levels.
IS YOUR GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY?
It depends on how many chores are left to do on the chore list.
WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES?
Amazing Grace
The Shawshank Redemption
The Sandlot
The Notebook
Pretty Woman
DO YOU USE THE RIGHT KEYS WHEN WORKING ON A KEYBOARD?
Yes, thanks Mom for making me take keyboarding as a youngster. We’re continuing that tradition in our household with Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing. The kids haven’t figured out that they’re actually learning something yet.
WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED?
Cat hair… lots and lots of cat hair (because she’s neurotic and pulls it out constantly)
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?
7
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?
Figure skating’s not bad, hockey is ok. Outside of those, sports are really not my thing, unless one of my kids is competing in something.
WHO IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE BAND OR RECORDING ARTIST?
Third Day
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BEVERAGE?
Diet Dr. Pepper or Diet Coke – nectar of the gods.
Keep lookin up!
Not sure if this is how to get a hold of you or not, I’m a stepmom to 2 boys, 10 and 8, and a mom to 2 boys, 16 and 13. Also in the middle of a custody battle for my oldest, we won custody of my husband’s two and life has never been the same. My stepchildren aren’t monsters, they just want to see their mom more, but some of the things they’ve said just to get to that point are unreal and have caused so much chaos. I would love to get the password from you…
Revealing
I actually knew some of this about you!
Baby Magic Shampoo is my favorite too!!! The problem is, I think they have changed it recently and I haven’t been able to get the old stuff…..
My little guy is still only fuzzy, but when he starts needing it, I need to have that smell!!
Mind if I barrow this for my About me page lol… I hate trying to think of stuff to write there… Maybe I will just post a “everyone ask me something for my about me page” post lol.
@Chelly – Borrow away! I had a tough time coming up with things for my About Me page, too. I took this stuff from one of those e-mails someone sent me with a bunch of questions about me.
Awesome blog! I look forward to reading it
ANd thanks for the post on my page.
Cheers!
People magazine is (shamefully) my favorite too. I’d like to say that the Heroes Among Us section is my favorite, but it’s really the paparazzi pics in the front.
My favorite is People too. Although I never buy the magazine (I only look at it when I am in the grocery store). However, I am so addicted to their website. http://www.people.com I click on it endlessly through-out the day.
You know it is bad when my 12 yr. old step-daughter, comes to me with the “who’s and what’s” of the entertainment world!
People is da bomb!!
i opened my blog recently more to say in coming future
want to share more and more with the people hope the whole worlid in peace and love mithout enemity.my email
raghunandan_reddy@yahoo.com
I would like the password, if you please. I mostly lurk, but I check here everyday and send little prayers your way when you’ve posted about something you’re struggling with.
You can send it to pamcee71 at yahoo dot com. Thanks!
I love your blog and am going thru a lot with an ED. I would like a pssword so i can continue reading your blog. Thanks!
i love your blog- please send me a password
I love your blog… I had the password but lost my email that was sent to me… can I please have it again… thanks!
Ann
Can I get a password. I used to read all of the time but them you went protected and I could not figure out where to comment to request a password…I hope you get it here. BTW: I am a mom in Indiana. I have two SS (9 an 10) and one BS (10) and one BD (8). I am always interested in hearing someone elses stories of being a step mom.
Thanks
I’m Minnie at http://www.theirwickedstepmother.blogspot.com, I’d love to have a look around.
I’m a stepmom…..dealing with a lot of issues due to a controlling ex-wife. We have 6 kids between us.
I’d love to read your blog.
Hi, I’m a stepmom looking for resources and support. I liked your blog title and would like to start following it.
My domestic partner has full legal, primary physical of his/our 3 1/2 year old boy.
Hi! I have been browsing different sites involving blended families and came across yours! I would love to see your point of view. I am currently a stepmom of an 11 yr old boy and a 9 yr old girl as well I have my own 11 yr old son! I always dreamed of being a “Stepmom” when I grew up, didn’t every little girl? This is what I have advised my stepkids of when dealing with the most difficult times and needed them to stand in my shoes for a moment. Oh and did I mention I also have the evil bio mom who’s ultimate goal in life is to make mine as difficult as possible…
Hi, i’ve been meaning to ask if i can take a peak into your life.
Thanks
I think you’ve read some about me on my blog. If you want to know more to ensure i’m not from the “dark side” just ask
Glad I kept the link to your blog (seem to not have your current email) so I can still get in touch with you! Hope you and the fam are well and had good holidays. I’d love the password (I don’t think you had that when you sent me the URL in 2007). And you should join Facebook — sudden influx of all sorts of folks from our class including some FABULOUS photos from the ’80s…
Hi, aaagh! I lost your password again. I remember it being ndrpr1vacy or something like that? Can you send it to me? I am dying to read your blog!
Hi,
I am a step-mom.
I have a 10 year old daughter from a previous marriage that my husband adopted. My step-daughter is 9 and we have joint custody. Our youngest daughter is 3. My husband and I have been married for 5 years and been together for 7 years.
We LOVE our kids – our worlds revolve around them all of them. In our home there is no separation, step, half, adopted or whatever. Just our family.
The ex-wife has never really liked me being in the picture – everything is my fault somehow. Even their divorce which was over a year before I even came around – amazing what people can convince themselves of isn’t it? Anyways! I have done really well not to let her get to me, just let my husband deal with her on the must issues and on everything else – listen to her, be respectful but not let her control or manipulate things in our home.
Then last year we got hit with a bomb and completely blind sited.
My husband went to pick up SD on her birthday for his 2 hours with her – but his ex wouldn’t let him have her. She wouldn’t even open the door and she called the cops. It all sounds dramatic but it really wasn’t. Husband remained calm, showed the cops the court papers and they were on his side. But they couldn’t make her release SD so they suggested husband file contempt of court.
She knew this cause the next day she took SD to doctor – who prescribed tylenol. And then she went to an attorney and sued my husband for custody stating the reason was that I was physically and verbally abusing my step-daughter.
Now this is absurb for so many reasons! My husband is an excellent father – never misses his time with SD – never misses child support – I mean from the moment I met him his world has revolved around his kids. I have never ever hurt my step-daughter I can’t even remember the last time I spanked her on her bottom and even then I have never done anything that could even remotely be considered abuse.
Suddenly I needed support from other step-moms – thats how I found your site.
The ex has no evidence – NONE! She can’t even remember any dates as to when the alleged abuse happened. The school supports our case, even the ex’s own father is on our side.But with tricks from her attorney she has managed to draw out this lawsuit for almost a year now. We have all gone to a third party psychologist for an evaluation – he has cleared me of ANY and ALL wrong doing. We counter sued for extended visitation which was recommended by the psychologist and our attorney believes we will get hands down.
Right now we are waiting to see if the ex will acceept the psychologist’s version of what is best for my step-daughter in mediatation OR if she wants to make herself look silly and go to trial which will cost us all an arm and a leg but in the end will still result in the psychologist recommendation of more time with us.
I have just been SO disappointed as to how INNOCENT GOOD Dads and Step-Mom’s can be drug through this stress, money and heart-ache because of an insecure and jealous ex-wife.
I know I sound bitter but I promise you that it is a recent result from this lawsuit – prior to this lawsuit and what she has accused me of I was the biggest advocate of peace and respect between our 2 homes – her daughters homes and family. I went out of my way to be nice to her and to get along. But to her getting along is getting her way – she has difficulty accepting fair compromises it either works her way or she throws fits.
Well anyways that is my Step-Mommy stress – makes me sad to pay for our lawyers retirement rather than investing in us. And I dread future graduations, weddings and grandkids to share with her. Send me your password if you care to share your blog I would love to check it out.
Kimberly
Hello!
I am a stepmom of an 8 year old little girl. Her dad and I started dating when she was 2 and we have been married since 2005. DH has joint custody and we see SD every other weekend. We have our share of problems with BM. Your blog was recommended by somone in another forum with a similar theme (I would be happy to tell you which if you email me privately). I’m always searching for insight and I heard your blog is the best!
Take care,
Enough Already
Hi there!
I had actually read your blog quite frequently before you had to password protect it. Then I was unsure about asking for a password but decided I should just do it!
Anyway, so I will let you know a little bit about me and my family. I have been a “stepmom” for almost 3 years and this weekend we are making it official!!! I only have 1 Stepson who I will call Henry. He is 11yrs old now(8 when dad and I met).
I had met Gary(Dad)after BM filed for divorce. Unfortunately all the legal stuff wasn’t completely finalized but we just really hit it off…so after 1.5 yrs of dating & a 1.5 year engagement, we are getting married! Henry seems to be pretty excited, don’t think he completely understands because for 3 years I have been stepmom anyway. Henry literally lives with us 50% of the time, every other week schedule. He seems to do pretty well for the most part. We know he still struggles because an every other week schedule has to be pretty difficult. No set routine….and as most parents now, kids depend on that.
For the most part though BM leaves us alone. She didn’t bother much with Henry when her and Gary were married and still doesn’t have much interest in him now. School work, school parties, assemblies, sport practices, games, etc. are all taken care of by Gary and I – regardless of which week it is. Unfortunately Henry will always hold on to that hope and wonder why BM didn’t bother with him. But Fortunately Henry does realize that Gary and I are always there for him and can depend us.
Anyway that is a quick overview of my little family and if you don’t mind giving me a password I would love to get back into reading your blog again!!! Thanks! ~MommaJac
From one wicked step mother to another, I would love read your blog.
There isn’t much to say about myself, although you are welcome to check out my blog to find out about my wonderful life *eyeroll*.
Anyone who calls diet coke the nectar of the gods is a friend of mine!
Hi!
My name is “Rose”. I am a “one day to be” stepmom of 2 kiddos. My partner, Clint has a 13 year old girl and a 10 year old boy. We are currently in a custody battle (That after two years should finally be seeing the inside of a court room next week….although I have thought that three other times and it has yet to happen). His ex is…insane….and probably a drug addict. It’s not pretty. I recently started my own blog just to get things off of my chest and hopefully connect with other women who have been or are in similar situations. I have the greatest friends in the world, but not one of the understands fully what I’m going through. I would very much like to be able to read your blogs….but I understand if that is not something you want to share with me. If you need any other info, please let me know.
Thank you.
HELP! I can’t remember the password to your blog……….I’m DYING to read what’s been happening in your world.
You can email it to me at tia0220@hotmail.com
Thanks
Kristin
Hi there! I would absolutely love to learn more about you and your family. I was until recently a single, active duty (deployed) mother of 2 ( son,8 and daughter,6) (who are with my parnets until I return). My fiance’ is also active duty and the father of 2 (son,9 daughter,7). I have never navigated the “bonus mom” role and am finding comfort in knowing that Im completely normal to be excited, welcoming, scared, slightly intimidated and just plain lost, all at the same time.
Hi! I would love to be able to read your blog as it’s so nice to be able to read other stepmoms’ advice and what they’re going through. It’s not an easy job, but it’s a rewarding one (sometimes : )). I just started my own blog very recently, feel free to check it out!
Thanks,
Tulip
familyinbloom@gmail.com
Hi-
I just recently started my own blog, and have been looking for others who are in a simillar situation as me. So I hope you will let me read along to your blog. My husband and I met when my SS was 5 (I call him “the Kid” its not mean, just to protect identities) and we married in 2008 after being together for 4 years.
We have 50/50 custody, and while Bio Mom can be evil, her issue is usually sheer laziness. So it is difficult trying to raise a child who’s mother acts like everyone should do everything for her, and always has an excuse, because he begins to bahave the same way.
Its also difficult because, while I don’t say I am perfect, I do think a I am a GOOD step mom. I try to do what is in his best interest, to help him grow up to be a good person. It is very difficult when there is no recognition of my effort and I am always picking up the slack, because her laziness hurts “the Kid” so I can’t make him suffer for his mothers laziness.
The only thing that gets Bio mom off her butt to start acting like a parent (rare moments) is the fact that I think she gets embarassed by her lack of involvement in her sons life and I make her look bad. Like when it took her 6 months to make him a Dr. appt so I finally did, and suddenly her schedule cleared up and she could take him.
So anyway, it would be nice to see what other women in my position are going through, because I don’t know any other step moms. All my friends are still single for the most part, or they don’t have any kids. And we are the first “blended” family on my side of the family tree.
Thanks
Hi, your front page says to leave a comment for the password. I am a stepmom to one step-daughter from my husband’s previous relationship. I found your blog through TheStepFamilyLife page.
I’d be happy to answer any other questions privately through email.
Thank you
I hope you’ll share your password with me. I kept up with your blog for a very long time. My husband’s exwife has BPD. I might’ve found you from the BPD Central board. Sadly, our marriage didnt last. I thought I was being smart…I didnt marry until I was 30. We didnt make it 5 years. But I know I tried all I could. As you know…without the husband’s support…it just wont work. My only therapy and release was from these fabulous blogs. I stayed away from the blogs for a long time after the seperation..but know I’m back. It still helps me. Thanks!!
Hi, I am a “practical stepmom” of 2 kids, ages 6 and 8. We all live together though I am not married to the children’s dad. I have been reading all I can on stepmoms and dealing with ex’s etc, and came across your site via Mrs. H’s. I’d I would like to follow your blog, too. I’m hoping to start my own blog soon, and I’ll be sure to pass on the info as soon as I get my act together enough to post something! Thanks for sharing your experiences.
All about Me:
My husband Matt and I recently married after 4 years of cohabitating. We have a blended family of 6, and it makes for a fun filled life. We have our ups and downs as all families do we just need bigger bumper pads than most. Having some additional support from others who understand our unique situation definitely helps. I look forward to reading more of your posts … Here more about me..
My name is Kimberly..
LIVING ARRANGEMENT?
One Husband – 6 Kids – (4 Boys 21, 20, 8, 4) (2 Girls 18, 12)
2 Shitzus Dori & Nemo who have 2 Shitzu’s Loki & Applesauce
2 Ragdoll Cats Gazo & Patches
WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSEPAD?
I don’t have a mousepad I use a notebook
FAVORITE BOARDGAME?
Scrabble
FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
Cosmopoliton – I know I Know I can’t believe I actually wrote it down – my favorite part is the “Bitch it out” page
FAVORITE SMELL?
Lavender.
LEAST FAVORITE SMELL?
.Moth Balls
FAVORITE SOUND?
My kiddos laughing. (”Mommy, I love you” is right up there, too.)
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
How lucky I am.
FAVORITE COLOR?
FAVORITE FRUIT?
Banana’s
HOW MANY RINGS TO ANSWER THE TELEPHONE?
2-3
WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE?
Time
FAVORITE FOOD?
Cheese
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Vanilla
DO YOU DRIVE FAST?
No
DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
Dogs?
STORMS: COOL OR SCARY?
Scary
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?
)
1975 Chevy Caprice – Called it the Luv Machine
DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
The kids favorite veggies so we have these (2-3) times a week so YES…
WHAT WOULD BE YOUR FAVORITE JOB IN THE WORLD?
I once had someone tell me do what you love and the money will come. So I am a system’s analyst and I have always’s wanted to do that I have done this for 20 years and I love it. So I guess I would have to say it is my “Favorite Job”
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HAIR COLOR?
I like my hair – I am a natural Red Hed
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
I am now.
IS YOUR GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY?
Half Full
WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES?
What Dreams May Come
Home for the Holidays
What the Bleep do We Know
DO YOU USE THE RIGHT KEYS WHEN WORKING ON A KEYBOARD?
Yes.
.
WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED?
Dog Toys.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?
3
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?
Don’t watch Sports
WHO IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE BAND OR RECORDING ARTIST?
Jason Miraz
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BEVERAGE?
Coffee Coffee Coffee JAVA
I’d love to read your blog, just started my own up and have been reading other blogs to help navigate the world of step-kids and crazy ex’s.
Hi! I am a Stepmom-in-training – meaning that I live with my boyfriend who has a daughter but we’re not married yet. Definitely heading in that direction!
I LOVE his daughter with all my heart but Bio-Mom likes to make my life difficult.
Just looking to share information and stories – I don’t come from a divorced family and none of my friends’ significant others have kids so I’m sort of going this alone.
I’d love your password to share.
Thanks!
MB