Things You Might Not Want to Know

I totally stole this meme from That Chick Over There… OK, I didn’t actually steal it because she said, “If you would like to do this meme, help yourself!”

Either way, here it is:

1. What kind of SOAP is in your bathtub right now?

Upstairs, the kids have Beaver Butt soap from our trip to Alaska. If you belong to PETA, don’t stress. There really aren’t any Beaver Butts in the soap. In our bathtub downstairs? No soap. It has jets. Jets + Soap = Bad

2. Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator?

It’s October. No.

3. What would you change about your living room?

I would change the fact that I don’t have a living room. Just a family room, which I love. But I think I’m permanently scarred from not having a living room. I think my Mother instilled in me that one should have a living room and I’m just not quite “there” in life yet, because I’m still in a living room-free zone.

4. Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty?

Dirty. I live in a household of 6 people. There is a two-minute window during which the dishes in my dishwasher are actually clean. Then they’re just used again and replaced by dirty ones.

5. What is in your fridge?

Leftover pizza, eggs, Hummingbird feeder stuff that looks very much like Kool-Aid (I suspect some of the members of our household really thought it WAS Kool-Aid and drank some but we’ll talk about that another time), milk, butter, 1/2 teaspoon of Miracle Whip in a GIANT container, other assorted condiments, and some shriveled up grapes.

6. White or wheat bread?

Whole wheat.

7. What is on top of your refrigerator?

About a metric ton of dust and other stuff My Hubby put up there just to tick me off since I can’t reach it.

8. What color or design is on your shower curtain?

I don’t have a shower curtain. I have a shower completely encased in glass–don’t get me started about the genius that decided a shower should be completely surrounded by glass… clear glass, even. You get the picture. It’s not pretty.

9. How many plants are in your home?

There are numerous plants. Too many to count. It’s important to note that these plants only exist because My Hubby takes care of them. I am the black thumb.

10. Is your bed made right now?

No. Do people still really make the bed? Except for when company comes over (like my in-laws or something), why? It’s just going to get un-made in less than 12 hours. I could conquer the world in the time I would spend making my bed every day. I’ll have to get to work on that.

11. Comet or Soft Scrub?

Bon Ami.

12. Is your closet organized?

No. I need a closet intervention, really. Maybe I’ll write to California Closets and get them to do a closet makeover…

13. Can you describe your flashlight?

It’s a big one. Black, holds like 11 hundred batteries.

14. Do you drink out of glass or plastic most of the time at home?

Glass. But the kiddos all drink out of plastic. Shattered glass and wood floors do not make happy feet.

15. Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now?

Yes, but it’s fake Iced Tea. It’s Crystal Light Peach Iced Tea.

16. If you have a garage, is it cluttered?

No. My Hubby is ANAL about his garage organization. It’s like a show garage. Seriously.

17. Curtains or blinds?

Blinds on all windows. Curtains in the bedrooms along with the blinds.

18. How many pillows do you sleep with?

One. Unless you count My Hubby and the cat, then three.

19. Do you sleep with any lights on at night?

No. I like complete darkness.

20. How often do you vacuum?

Twice a week. We aren’t home except for twice a week, except to sleep.

21. Standard toothbrush or electric?

Standard.

22. What color is your toothbrush?

Purple.

23. Do you have a welcome mat on your front porch?

Yes. I arm wrestled My Hubby at the store (and won) to get one that looks like little cobblestones. He wanted one that said, “Go away!” He really is nice, I promise.

24. What is in your oven right now?

A couple of oven racks and some carbonized pizza that will NEVER come out of that oven no matter how much Easy Off we spray in there and no matter how long the Easy Off sits on it.

25. Is there anything under your bed?

Cat hair. About 800 pounds of it. Because I have a neurotic cat that pulls her hair out instead of just grooming herself like normal cats do.

26. Chore you hate doing the most?

Cleaning the toilets. I live in a household with 2 boys and 1 man. We have three bathrooms. I don’t have an aiming problem. Therefore I have passed the cleaning of the toilets baton right along to the three of them. Ironing would be a close second. I just let the dryer do the ironing for me.

27. What retro items are in your home?

My Hubby is the keeper of all things retro. They mostly go in the garage. He has a gazillion old hubcaps, oil cans, tin signs, and more. I’m not really a retro kind of gal, unless you count the 80’s as retro. If so, I think I have a pair of legwarmers running around somewhere.

28. Do you have a separate room that you use as an office?

Yes. But I don’t know if I’d really call it an office as much as I would call it a room that holds the 8,000,000 pieces of paper we deal with every month… and the computer.

29. How many mirrors are in your home?

Four

30. Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home?

I have about $30 in pennies in a hatbox. We dump that out every now and again when somebody is short on lunch money. I’m sure the lunch lady loves us.

31. What color are your walls?

All the walls in my house are white, except for the office, which is Sand Dollar.

32. Do you keep any kind of protection weapons in your home?

No. I figure if someone wants my stuff that bad, they can have it. Or I’ll just use My Hubby’s marble rolling pin on ’em.

33. What does your home smell like right now?

Cinnamon.

34. Favorite candle scent?

Cinnamon.

35. What kind of pickles (if any) are in your refrigerator right now?

Sweet, dill, relish, stackers, you name it. We are a pickle eatin’ family!

36. What color is your favorite Bible?

Blue. It’s a new one. The Message.

37. Ever been on your roof?

No. But I’ve stood on the ground while My Hubby was on the roof, shaking in my shoes, certain that he would fall off! I don’t have a fear of heights for myself, just for other people.

38. Do you own a stereo?

I own a car. It has a stereo, but I never turn it on.

My Hubby has a stereo in the house, but I beg him not to turn it on.

I’m not a big stereo person. You know how people say, “If it’s too loud, you’re too old?” I’m too old. I like quiet.

39. How many TVs do you have?

Four, counting the one in the basement that I got for High School graduation a billion years ago that still actually sorta kinda works, as long as you don’t want to do anything fancy like hook up DirecTV to it.

40. How many house phones?

3, but I’m thinking about getting rid of land lines entirely.

41. Do you have a housekeeper?

Yes! I have four of them. Daphne, Velma, Freddy and Shaggy. Call Social Services if you feel you must. I’m not against child labor, especially when they labor so hard to make the messes in the first place.

42. What style do you decorate in?

I don’t decorate. I leave that to My Hubby–the one with more artistic ability than an overripe grapefruit.

43. Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints?

Solids

44. Is there a smoke detector in your home?

Three.

45. In case of fire, what are the items in your house which you’d grab if you only could make one quick trip?

My Hubby, Daphne, Velma, Freddy and Shaggy… and the cat. Maybe the turtle if I had time and he didn’t hiss at me. And our wedding pictures, which aren’t digitized yet. Everything else, as Chick so eloquently put it, is just stuff… and we have insurance.

If you would like to do this meme, help yourself!

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